Competitive Me!

by Roberta Durra

At first meeting I may appear rather quiet, mild mannered and shy. And I am.

Quite a few interactions later, this may also be the case. But once I’m comfortable with you…. things change. I unleash my dry wit and all is fair game. And my quiet demeanor changes even more dramatically if you become my opponent. Or even if I think you are. 

I don’t have a traditional sports background, so my competitive nature has come on slowly. I really don’t know where it came from. My parents were not competitive people, although my mom did play a mean game of mahjong. But this I know, if we happen to be in a bowling alley together and we casually walk by the air-hockey table, I will nonchalantly ask if you have a few quarters and if you’d like to play. You might agree and we will get in our positions at either end of the table. Smiling at each other while waiting for the game to begin, you will expect a docile game of air-hockey against a docile opponent.  But player beware! The minute the air starts blowing the puck around, Jesus, Mary & Joseph!!! You will not know what hit you. I am a beast. I will flail myself on the table diving for the most difficult shots. I get super hero vision and knock those pucks back at you with an Olympic air-hockey finesse that can only have been mastered in a previous life. This will continue until our hands are numb from gripping the mallet, or we’ve run out of quarters.

I have also seen my competitive nature rear its unattractive head during yoga class. I am aware there is no less competitive venue than a yoga class, but that doesn’t stop me. We are specifically told not to look around and compare ourselves. I understand that I am supposed to look inward to discover what my own body is telling me. But honey, if you are in a downward dog, I will see your downward dog and raise you one. I will downward dog beside you and even lift one of my back legs up in the air. Hey, I might raise both legs and stay in a handstand just for the heck of it. I might even stay upside down until the class ends and walk out on my hands.

I am competitive in Zumba dance class too. I emulate Ethel Merman who sang “Anything you can do I can do better” It won’t matter that we’re decades apart in age and that you are barely breaking a sweat while you effortlessly dance circles around me. I don’t care that you have enough energy to take Body-Pump-Combat class immediately after Zumba. I know my face has turned the color of tomato paste from exertion. But I feed off your energy like a remora on a shark. I dance to your tempo and sometimes faster, even though I feel like I’m about to toss my cookies. I am Rocky Balboa to your Apollo Creed and you haven’t even said hello to me. You also have no idea that while trying to either keep up with, or “best” you, I have pulled several leg muscles and will be out of class for a month.

Our new neighbor has a ping-pong table in his yard. Guess where I’m going with this. I had a ping pong table in my basement that I used from the age of eleven to twelve. I have not tackled the sport since. My husband fancies himself a ping-pong expert because he grew up playing.  So what? He and I picked up the paddles at our neighbor’s party. It started out easy and friendly. Then the speed picked up a tad. Then, like riding a bike, the mojo returned. I remembered how to slice and dice and I was in it for the kill. Hubby didn’t know what hit him. He could easily beat me, but he was so taken aback by my intense play that he couldn’t stop laughing and I won.  End of story.

Recently I have become a competitive blogger. David, (my good friend and blog partner) and I can look at the stats on our blog and tell how many “hits” each of our blog entries get. Yep, we don’t know WHO has read our stuff, but we know how MANY people have read our individual pieces. And it looks like David is in the lead. Does this bother me? What do you think? I need more readers, but until this happens I suggest that you read my blog twice. Once in the morning and once before bedtime. Maybe even once on each computer you own! This way you can better absorb the complex issues I write about, and I can get more hits than David. But who’s counting?!

 

All kidding aside, I have some thoughts about being competitive. I think competitiveness is good when used with common sense and moderation. It sometimes helps you to strive to do better than you might otherwise. I also know that being best is neither reasonable, nor is it a worthwhile goal for me anymore. I don’t need to take home the prize. As long as I know I have given my all, I feel satisfied. I have come to realize this is the way I want to live my life. I think most would agree. Now go to your other computer and read this again.